beauty grows within

Ok, the laminate flooring and the tile for the kitchen/tv room are on their way. Ted has indicated that the gas lines need replacing as does the water heater.

If there is one thing i have learned from watching home remodeling shows, it's this, you will invariably run into all kinds of hurdles when you set out to complete project A. Project A becomes sub-part a, b, c, d, e and sometimes even f. challenging...i still don't know how he does it. How do you keep your wits about you, my dear?

Little girl has been thumping away today. it amazes me when i read that my moods affect her. if she is feeling my day today, i apologize....you shouldn't have to feel stress this early in your life! i wonder if she feels my frustration when i am driving. I wonder if she feels my emotions when i just want to up and cry for no reason at all. i wonder how we will be able to console one another once she is born....because no matter what happens right now, i am able to run my hand over my belly and lightly remind her i love her and somehow, everything to me is OK.

I picture her in my rear view mirror when i'm in the car. I imagine her crying in the middle of the night. I see another infant smile and wonder what her smile looks like. I hear a child laughing and hope our girl is the happiest in the world. Becoming a mom is going to be an incredible experience. I am only experiencing part of that now and it lights up my world. I sit and wonder if she is comfortable, all squished up inside of me. I sit back and probe trying to get her to play with me. I talk to her when i think she is napping. I sing and remind her that i know no lullabys. I ask her what music she prefers to listen to. I try to imagine what she sees, feels and tastes. all of it, yes all of it.....is the most precious thing on earth. our baby, our daughter, our precious little girl.